Hello friends

So it's been a while! Google tells me the last time I posted was in April 2015, I'm sorry. Between moving house, family illness and starting a new job I've been struggling with finding anytime to really blog. But I promise, now things are settling I will get back into the swing of things.

   I'm also going to be completely honest and tell you that with my life getting a whole lot more busy I've been finding it difficult to spend tonnes (if any) of time with God. Due to my work I missed most Sunday's at church (which, I know many of you totally may shame me for working on a Sunday) was unavoidable. It's not easy, nowadays sustaining a decent job without working the weekends - especially here in the UK. I'll tell you a wee bit about what has been going on over the past 6 or so months.

Leaving university.

So, one of the hardest and most trusting choices I had to make was to leave university. I had always wanted to go to university and felt that it was part of the path that God had set out for my life. As I've probably mentioned before I didn't have the best time at uni, in my first year I preferred going out and drinking to spending time looking at churches (although I did have a church, but didn't really serve in it at all). Then in the second half of that year one of my close friends died, causing me to question God (& in turn the Christians who surrounded me who didn't offer to pray or anything). I then got glandular fever in the summer - which resulted in an incredible realisation of who God was and His awesomeness, but also in me developing post-viral-depression (which is very common in people who've had glandular fever). I hated university at this point and struggled to get out of bed or even socialise. I was exhausted - not only from the glandular fever - but also from the depression (I'm going to do a blog especially on this at some point). This depression grew into anxiety and then led me to really struggle at uni (a place where we were totally independent in working and everything). I had a little job on the side and I'd been going out with Chris for a wee while, so seemingly I had everything made. I let people believe this because it was so much easier to smile and get on with stuff.  But I was struggling a lot. So, after doing uni in third year for a couple of months I finally decided to leave uni. I prayed about it and asked God to make things easier for me if its what was planned. And God totally made things happen.

Moving home.

So, after deciding to leave uni I needed to figure out what I wanted to do. I knew I wanted to move closer to Chris, so I spent time thinking and praying about it. I chatted to friends - some girls who I had met the year before about my situation. They laughed as they told me they needed a new flatmate. They lived in the same city as Chris as they were as they were at uni there. So I moved in with them. And honestly, I can say I have been totally blessed by God. The three girls I live with love Jesus, love life and love doing exactly what Jesus wants us to do. Each of them individually emulate Christ in their own unique way and encourage me to do the same. They help me strive toward getting closer to God, ensuring my relationship with Chris is Christ-centred and fulfil my true potential. I couldn't ask for better girls to live with.

New job.

So one more part of the puzzle that needed to be sorted was getting a job. I needed a job that meant that I would be able to live comfortably. I applied for many jobs, including a couple of church admin jobs. I ended up getting a job working for a mental health charity, as a support worker. I found this job not only challenging but also incredibly humbling. After a while I began to realise that God was preparing me for his plan. I was slowly starting to realise that my heart was really for people who were on the edges of society, people who had been forgotten about. This burning in my heart has enabled me to realise that working in the care sector was something that ultimately God had wanted me to do. This job meant that I have began to understand what I am meant to do.

   

That's pretty much what's been going on for the past few months, now you're up to speed I hope you understand why it's been so quiet recently!

I promise I'll get better at doing this again and I'll get back into it. God is going to do incredible things & is already showing my some incredible things that He's already done. I know now that I am to get ready and go - not to wait about until something happens, but God will allow something to happen, but I in turn need to be prepared. So right now I'm preparing myself for the journey He has in store for me and I know that through Him (& only through Him) I will achieve great things. 

Where does blogging come into this?

So I truly believe that God has given me a gift of words. I love writing and reading. Journaling during my quiet time is the best way, I find, for me to really understand what God is saying. I also believe that due to this I have a platform to be brutally honest and vulnerable. I know sometimes it's difficult, when you're struggling to find someone who understands (or sometimes you don't want people to know), so I feel that God has given me this opportunity to write and hopefully support and encourage others who may need it. I also find this is a great way of proclaiming all the amazing things God has done for me. He is amazing and I love telling of his great works in me!

Thanks my friends, talk very soon!

'Come, let us sing for joy to the Lord; let us shout aloud to the rock of salvation.' PSALM 95:1

Blessings

May x

Stop a moment

Just stop.

In a world full of movement it's very difficult to take a moment and just stop. We struggle to take time out for anything other than what we need to do, what we deem as important. Even when we seem not to be busy we still find it difficult to just stop. Smart phones and laptops hinder this in the same way, social networking has become so easy to do from pretty much anywhere, so even when we do think we're resting we still seem to find ourselves on Twitter or Facebook just waiting. The amount of times we must go on people's facebook just to stalk them (or to get annoyed by them in my case), is ridiculous (awkward now if I'm the only one who does it...). We are in a world that is ruled by technology and moving forward, we forget the small things, we forget just to be still.

'Be still, and know that I am God' (Psalm 46:10)

This is one of my favourite verses, it's poignant and hard hitting whilst it remains a simple message. Be still.
    I'm a full time student studying English (yes, it is a real degree..), I also have a part time job (I sell kilts) and serve in my church. It's not really that much, but that, on top of spending time with my friends, really does all add up. I find myself at the end of the week getting into bed and wondering where the week has gone. On occasion I realise I haven't prayed, again. It's not out of not wanting to, it's purely because I forget to put time aside to spend with God. I sometimes feel working in church is enough, I forget to take time with God and completely abandon myself to Him. This then becomes a problem. I love serving in my church, working with young people is incredible - I love seeing them grow and the rising up of a new generation, it's so exciting to see. I encourage them to read their Bible and pray, spending much needed time with God - even though I sometimes forget this myself. I try and input into their lives, but as I lack spending time with God, I subsequently lack in the quality of my input. I'm sure you're familiar with the phrase 'You reap what you sow', this does not just count in the way in which we treat people, it also means that what we sow into our life - what we invest in (take time with God) - shows in our lives and our teachings. Without being still and properly spending time with God we fall away from knowing Him, from getting properly close to Him. We can't expect to know someone we don't take time in knowing.
     I feel however the above verse isn't just about spending time in getting to know God, I think it's also just spending time with God - letting His abundant love wash over you. God loves you so much and wants nothing more than for you to spend time with Him; resting in His love. When was the last time you actually spent time in God's presence when you weren't praying for something? When you were totally and utterly overwhelmed by Him; when His love was tangible? I think we sometimes forget just how precious we are in Christ - you are His child and He more than delights in you, sometimes we need to refresh this in our minds, we need to remind ourselves of His unconditional love.  Get to know God's character, get to know His plans for you and remind yourself how much He delights in you. It's something we sometimes take for granted. We are taught as children that God is all loving, but as we grow up we forget this. When we are children we delight in prayer, in learning more of Him. How often do we still do that? We need to remember our childlike faith and come to God as His child. When we do this we find it easier to hear God - to rest in His grace and to read His word.
    It's easier said than done. You may read this, feel a bit convicted, pray tonight and then get busy again. You may not find the right sort of structure to help you. I know not everyone's way of spending quiet time is the same, I get that people have different ways of doing it (some people like set times, others don't mind it not being the same time every day). It doesn't matter how you do it - it doesn't make you more/less holy than the next person, people are just different. But here is my own personal way I master quiet time; (DISCLAIMER: quiet time does not have to be a big thing - you can also have quiet time on your way to work/school/university - this is just for the time when you need to be still).

*Put time aside. This isn't a chore - but make sure you are able to make time to get into God. Don't do it as a last minute thing. First thing in the morning is a great time, but this isn't completely necessary, whatever you feel best with*

1) Turn it off. This does not mean put everything on silent, it means turn it off, right off (I sound like a public awareness video). By doing this you have no temptation to look at your phone at all. Even better, put it in a different room.
2) Be alone. I truly believe that we all need time to rejuvenate on our own. As much as fellowship is great for our walk with God, also taking some time for just you and God is beneficial too. This way we are able to have an intimate time with Him.
3) Worship. One thing I find very helpful is the use of worship music whilst spending time just with God. The power of music and worshipping this way is incredible. One of the reasons most people burn out after a conference/festival is because they are not given the opportunity to have worship every morning/evening.
4) Write stuff down. This one really benefits me; I have a notebook (this is a great opportunity to raid Paperchase for their notebooks) and I write down my prayers and thoughts and what God has said to me. It works so well because I can look back on it and see how God has really worked in me - it reminds me of His promises and encourages me. It is also a great place to put the Bible verses that have stuck out for you.
5) Don't time it. Allow yourself to get lost in God, stop thinking about what your plans are. Take your rest in God (this is why it's best not to have time just before you're doing something). Quiet times don't have to last days, but make sure you aren't just doing it to tick it off your list.

     Put time aside to spend with God, don't make it a chore on your to-do list, delight in spending time with Him. Turn off your phone, disable your Facebook, just take time to be still and know that He is God. Rest in His presence a while. Remind yourself of all He has done for you, the miracles He has performed. He is God.

Blessings
May
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